If you’re thinking about freezing your eggs, or just want to know more about the process, you can learn a lot from Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s very public decision to freeze hers — so below, I’ve summarized 10 ways that AOC’s egg freezing decision can help you, plus some thoughts and advice of my own:
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By Vanessa Bombardieri, Certified Decision Coach
I will admit that when I first heard the hype around AOC’s public decision to freeze her eggs, my first thought was: OMG, why would she commit career suicide? She is already under so much scrutiny for everything she does! But then slowly, I began to see AOC’s choice as more of a political act, an educational act, and one that enabled her to stand firmly on her healthcare platform driven by economic and gender parity.
There are many important points I want to highlight here about AOC’s campaign, and other points that I encourage you to keep in mind.
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10 ways AOC’s egg freezing decision can help all of us:
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1. She is encouraging everyone considering having a child to get their hormones tested! Yes, agreed AOC.
2. She is emphasizing bodily autonomy and the individuality of her choice: “my body, my eggs, my outcomes.” We agree—autonomy is a tenant of our work at TBD but…we all still want to know how many she got??
3. She is teaching us all about the women’s reproductive cycle: the graphs, the medical terms, all the different hormones, estrogen, progesterone, HGC, LH. (Oh, how I’ve missed biology class!)
4. AOC is taking us step by step through the egg freezing process, exposing a complex and emotionally painful protocol that most women have kept hidden till now.
5. She is encouraging us to speak with more than one clinic/provider, and to seek recommendations for trusted contacts. We absolutely agree with that advice!
6. She is not afraid of showing us how much her body is changing—including her bloat and her belly—and she’s acknowledged how the process has made her more aware of her own body.
7. She is being transparent about the costs of reproductive preservation and demonstrating how those costs can be unpredictable. (See #5 below for more.)
8. AOC has ignited a conversation around fertility. In one of her recent videos she states: “One of the most important things that we can do is be able to have discussions about our options and rely on a community of women and other people to support one another. Nobody should feel they are going through a process like this alone.”
9. She spoke with her doctor about mental health concerns regarding hormone shifts from the medications, and they put a plan in place to take estrogen (I believe that’s correct) after the procedure.
10. She shops at Trader Joe’s like the rest of us, and has posted videos about healthy eating to her many followers. Check out this video of how she likes to use frozen blueberries.
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My additional advice and thoughts about egg freezing:
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1. Please do not confuse reproductive preservation with parenthood decision-making—they are not the same thing! In fact, we often find that having eggs or embryos in the freezer can make the decision-making process more complicated. For example: you meet somebody, you tell them you had some eggs frozen, and poof—they just assume a kid is the next step. But now, you’re not sure if you want to use them…
2. Keep in mind that if you choose to freeze your eggs and not use them, you will face a time where you have to decide what you will do with them. This often means destroying them, which can be difficult.
3. AOC is freezing eggs because she wants to “feel more in control” of her fertility, as this Slate article speaks about. However, so many additional factors such as thawing, fertilization and implantation and pregnancy remain out of one’s control. In addition, there is the possibility that she may never use the eggs she freezes.
4. One of AOC’s video posts shows a screencast on egg freezing outcomes. It’s not cited so we couldn’t fact-check it, but we wish she had dove a bit deeper into outcomes and the known challenges in tracking them specifically from egg freezing.
5. Egg storage is not cheap, and so far, AOC has not mentioned this ongoing cost. Clinics will not keep your ovum on ice for free! It can cost $1,000 to $1,500 a year.
6. Women often freeze their eggs and think, that’s it—I’m done with this hormone hassle, and when I’m ready, I can move on. But depending on the situation, a doctor may advise you to begin IVF by using fresh eggs, which means back to shots in the belly.
7. Sometimes, egg freezing may not be your best route. If protecting your fertility is your #1 priority, starting to try at an earlier age might be a better bet. Choosing parenthood and trying as soon as you can will improve your chances, according to statistics. While you might still be able to get pregnant at 39 or 41, you can’t count on that.
8. AOC does not strongly hit on the freezing eggs vs. embryos debate the way we might like. In one of her last videos about the topic, she reminds us that egg freezing is a personal choice. She also acknowledges that frozen embryos have been thought of as being more resilient than frozen eggs. (Some women freeze only embryos, while other women freeze eggs with or without a donor.) It is my general understanding that embryos can fare better than eggs, which is why I want you to take AOC’s advice to seek consultation from a reproductive endocrinologist or two, and decide what is best for you.
9. Surprisingly, she does not acknowledge the egg freezing boom that has happened since 2012 when it was no longer deemed experimental. It’s a huge business often owned by private equity and venture capitalists. These businesses do profit off of young women’s fears about their fertility. We do not see this as a reason, pre say, not to freeze your eggs, but we do want you to understand that there is a business behind the fertility industry. And we would never want anybody to feel pressure from a doctor or clinic to freeze eggs. (If this is the case, refer back to #5 above.)
Please note, we do not discourage anybody interested in this process from going through with it. Like AOC, we really want our readers and clients to understand it better and think about it as separate from the decision-making journey.
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TBD readers, have you had similar questions and worries?
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Does something I’ve said above resonate with you about worrying about post-motherhood stress? Have you thought of some other things that could help you with preventing or relieving postpartum stress and depression? Either way, you’re welcome to reach out and let us know via any of the contact links below. We’d love to hear from you!
What other questions can we help you address? How can we help you make the right choice for you? Reach out to me and Merle via our online contact form, or in our private Facebook group The Decision Café, or on any of our social media pages: Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter/X.
Finally, I invite you to catch up on our previous baby decision blog posts here.
– Vanessa