Make a faster, more confident decision as Merle leads you through a five-step process. Incisive exercises will cut through obsessive tangles of pros and cons to reveal your answer. You will steer clear of popular misconceptions, resist social pressure to parent, and handle couple disagreement. Based on thirty-five years of experience, this is the definitive work on the most important decision of your life.

The Baby Decision Book

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Are you thinking of having a child?

Merle Bombardieri

Here’s how my book, The Baby Decision: How to Make the Most Important Choice of Your Life, will help you in the process:

  • Your decision will be faster, and you’ll make it with more confidence as I lead you through the five steps of the decision.
  • Efficient self-exploration exercises and time-tested guidelines will cut through obsessive tangles of pros and cons. You'll know much more about the childfree choice, one-child, LGBT, and single-parent families so you can make your choice based on facts, not wrong assumptions.
  • You’ll have enough information about fertility and adoption to factor them into your decision.
  • You’ll know what to do if you and your partner disagree.
  • You’ll know how to cope with pressures from family and friends.

The Baby Decision is based on my thirty-five years as a psychotherapist, coach, and workshop leader specializing in parenthood decision-making.

Best wishes for your decision-making and enjoying your life.

As Seen In:

Extraordinary Praise

“Bombardieri is magic. In this book, she takes you by the hand into the depths of the scary and sometimes overwhelming baby decision. Step by step, she helps you find clarity. The Baby Decision is a must-read for everyone of child-bearing age.”

Mara Altman

Author of Thanks for Coming, Baby Steps and Bearded Lady

“The intelligence and generosity of Bombardieri’s perspectives are a gift to all women and men; she deeply honors individuality while reminding us of the compassion that is all of our potential.”

Bina Venkataraman

writer and climate policy expert

The Baby Decision is an indispensable guide. Brimming with humanity and respect, informed by research and infused with clinical wisdom, this book is a gem”

Stephanie Morgan, MSW, Psy.D.

Psychologist, Private Practice. Co-author, Mindfulness and Psychotherapy, and Compassion and Wisdom in Psychotherapy

The Baby Decision is extraordinarily stimulating and thought-provoking. I became addicted to each word and could not put the book down. It is clearly written and infused with wisdom. Highly recommended for women of childbearing age, their partners, and their OB-GYNs.”

Isaac Schiff, MD.

Chief of Obstetrics and Gynecology (Emeritus)
Vincent OB-GYN, Massachusetts General Hospital
Harvard Medical School

Learn More About The Baby Decision

From the Baby Decision Blog

Is Parenthood Right For You? (part 1 of 2)

Kayla Sheets, Genetic Counselor and hostess of Vibrant Gene, brings intelligence and playfulness to our discussion about finding the wisdom and courage to make either decision, I demonstrate my “Chair Dialogue” technique for cutting through ambivalence to reveal a valid choice. Kayla’s high energy and incisive questions keep it lively.

read more

Is Parenthood Right for You? (part 2 of 2)

After the interview above, Kayla facilitates a lively panel: a childfree man in his 60s, a midlife working mother of two, and the show’s own 25-year-old producer who was shocked to discover a reversal of the decision she had previously made! Participants not only describe their own experiences but ask each other creative questions about their lives. I offer some commentary. This show offers you a springboard for your own conversations about the decision..

read more

You Can’t Have Half A Baby

This Bustle article declares that disagreement about childbearing is the number one deal-breaker of all. It links to my Good Therapy article, “Should you Marry Someone Who Disagrees about Having a Child?” If you are thinking about tying the knot, you will want to read this first.

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The Baby Decision in Refinery 29

With The BabyDecision as our focus, British journalist—dry-humored, feminist Olivia Marks—pulls no punches in declaring her wariness of motherhood.  She based the article on our live talk which included social pressures to procreate whether that suits a person/couple or not. Her honesty and courage will help you pay attention to the voice inside that questions motherhood and pronatalism.

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Hitched Magazine Excerpts Merle’s Chapter on First Aid for Battling Couples

This lively online magazine, covering all aspects of love relationships, excerpted the “Tug of War” chapter of The Baby Decision. The chapter shows you how to move forward if you are disagreeing and offers practical steps for negotiating your best possible choice. Listening to and understanding each other’s needs frees you both for creative dialogue.

read more


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